Missing Dear Friends
I've had a not-so-great week, physically and emotionally. I spent a couple of days just curled up on the couch, unable to really move. Even chewing food and speaking became difficult. (A medication adjustment caused this, another adjustment is beginning to help me recover again.)
I gaze into the mirror and ask the reflection, "Who are you now? Who have you become?" I look at not-so-old photos of myself and ask, "I miss you, where did you go? Will you ever come back?"
I've done a fair bit of shaking my fist at God (read: "Giant Pity Party") but I guess I feel a little entitled to do so.
I'm struggling to do some of the simplest, most mundane tasks. I also know this, too, shall pass -- and I really DO try to balance it out with counting my blessings.
Then I lost two friends, untimely deaths for them both. Or at least "untimely" for those of us who loved them.
My Giant Pity Party turned into an angry rant.
These were two well-loved, multi-talented, gifted people -- younger than me, full of energy and kindness and LIFE, so much to offer the world. Why were they taken so soon? I'm feeling kind of used up and useless, so why them? And why not me? I got no real answers, by the way....but I'm still here so I guess there's more purpose for me to fulfill. I just don't understand some things, you know?
Let me tell you just a little bit about them both.
I moved to SC almost 10 years ago, first living in Winnsboro a couple of years before moving to Lake Wateree. Moving to a different place -- especially a small town -- after age 50 can present a challenge finding friends, when social groups are already in place. I had a small group of neighbor lady friends who included me in many things, but I found it hard to find other friends. Even most of the women at church seemed stand-offish toward me. Besides my neighbor friends (who remain dear and precious to me), I can count on about 3 fingers how many other good friends I found in that town.
Shane -- also known as Shadow -- was one of those.
We were friends the moment we met, recognizing the good in one another immediately. He was a talented musician who could play anything on the piano! We had great discussions on our different faiths and beliefs, a shared love of cats, and lots of laughs whenever we got together -- usually with our mutual friend Heidi rounding out our trio. He wanted me to teach him to sew and we made plans, but then I got sick. We were waiting for me to regain some strength -- but Shane's time ran out.
Heidi called me Saturday with the sad news that Shane had left us. He was only 33.
You don't forget people who befriended you when you were lonely, and I won't forget my friend Shadow.
Likewise -- you don't forget people that have been "on your side" that you've known most of your life.
Laura was one of those.
I'm about eight years older than Laura but she and her family had a huge impact on my life. Her parents, sisters, and brothers were all a part of the fabric of my hometown, my church growing up, my earliest friendships, my first real job. It is difficult for me to think about Peachland Baptist Church or even the town of Peachland without Laura's presence. She's always been A Force To Be Reckoned With -- in a GOOD way. You need a hug? Laura had wide open arms. You need a smile? Laura always gave away plenty. You feel a little sad? Go stand next to Laura -- she'll have you laughing at a joke or a story within minutes. She was an ENCOURAGER. I think she'd found the perfect job at a high school -- kids called her "Mama Hasty" because she took everyone under her wing. She was a favorite aunt to her nieces and nephews, a cherished sister and daughter. She was full of sass and mischief but wouldn't hurt a fly.
One of my favorite Laura stories took place at church. I was home visiting my parents, and went to church with them. There was a business meeting after service to discuss replacing their well-worn Nativity Scene. A member was giving a report of price comparisons of several different Nativity sets, offering several quotes to consider. The last quote was for a top-of-the-line set, costing about $30,000. Now that is a pretty steep amount, especially for a small country church (I'm not sure they even paid the preacher that much in a year, at that time!) and when she dropped that number, you could have heard a pin drop for a few moments. Then Laura cleared her throat and said, "Well, for $30,000, I'll wear a bathrobe and stand out there every night for a couple of weeks and TELL the story!"
The whole church congregation cracked up with laughter!
That's Laura -- quick witted and ready to use humor to make a point!
Her giant beautiful heart gave out on her.
I will miss her -- the town of Peachland will miss her forever.
So the world rocks on, without these two Bright Stars walking among us. I have to believe I'll see them again, one day.
Shane will play a song for me, maybe he'll sing too. I'm SURE he'll find a cat or two or ten to share with me!
Laura will tell me about playing softball with Jesus, or some joke she told Him that made him throw his head back and laugh with glee.
As the old hymn goes, "Oh what a day, what a glorious day that will be!"
I gaze into the mirror and ask the reflection, "Who are you now? Who have you become?" I look at not-so-old photos of myself and ask, "I miss you, where did you go? Will you ever come back?"
I've done a fair bit of shaking my fist at God (read: "Giant Pity Party") but I guess I feel a little entitled to do so.
I'm struggling to do some of the simplest, most mundane tasks. I also know this, too, shall pass -- and I really DO try to balance it out with counting my blessings.
Then I lost two friends, untimely deaths for them both. Or at least "untimely" for those of us who loved them.
My Giant Pity Party turned into an angry rant.
These were two well-loved, multi-talented, gifted people -- younger than me, full of energy and kindness and LIFE, so much to offer the world. Why were they taken so soon? I'm feeling kind of used up and useless, so why them? And why not me? I got no real answers, by the way....but I'm still here so I guess there's more purpose for me to fulfill. I just don't understand some things, you know?
I moved to SC almost 10 years ago, first living in Winnsboro a couple of years before moving to Lake Wateree. Moving to a different place -- especially a small town -- after age 50 can present a challenge finding friends, when social groups are already in place. I had a small group of neighbor lady friends who included me in many things, but I found it hard to find other friends. Even most of the women at church seemed stand-offish toward me. Besides my neighbor friends (who remain dear and precious to me), I can count on about 3 fingers how many other good friends I found in that town.
Shane -- also known as Shadow -- was one of those.
We were friends the moment we met, recognizing the good in one another immediately. He was a talented musician who could play anything on the piano! We had great discussions on our different faiths and beliefs, a shared love of cats, and lots of laughs whenever we got together -- usually with our mutual friend Heidi rounding out our trio. He wanted me to teach him to sew and we made plans, but then I got sick. We were waiting for me to regain some strength -- but Shane's time ran out.
Heidi called me Saturday with the sad news that Shane had left us. He was only 33.
You don't forget people who befriended you when you were lonely, and I won't forget my friend Shadow.
Likewise -- you don't forget people that have been "on your side" that you've known most of your life.
Laura was one of those.
I'm about eight years older than Laura but she and her family had a huge impact on my life. Her parents, sisters, and brothers were all a part of the fabric of my hometown, my church growing up, my earliest friendships, my first real job. It is difficult for me to think about Peachland Baptist Church or even the town of Peachland without Laura's presence. She's always been A Force To Be Reckoned With -- in a GOOD way. You need a hug? Laura had wide open arms. You need a smile? Laura always gave away plenty. You feel a little sad? Go stand next to Laura -- she'll have you laughing at a joke or a story within minutes. She was an ENCOURAGER. I think she'd found the perfect job at a high school -- kids called her "Mama Hasty" because she took everyone under her wing. She was a favorite aunt to her nieces and nephews, a cherished sister and daughter. She was full of sass and mischief but wouldn't hurt a fly.
One of my favorite Laura stories took place at church. I was home visiting my parents, and went to church with them. There was a business meeting after service to discuss replacing their well-worn Nativity Scene. A member was giving a report of price comparisons of several different Nativity sets, offering several quotes to consider. The last quote was for a top-of-the-line set, costing about $30,000. Now that is a pretty steep amount, especially for a small country church (I'm not sure they even paid the preacher that much in a year, at that time!) and when she dropped that number, you could have heard a pin drop for a few moments. Then Laura cleared her throat and said, "Well, for $30,000, I'll wear a bathrobe and stand out there every night for a couple of weeks and TELL the story!"
The whole church congregation cracked up with laughter!
That's Laura -- quick witted and ready to use humor to make a point!
Her giant beautiful heart gave out on her.
I will miss her -- the town of Peachland will miss her forever.
So the world rocks on, without these two Bright Stars walking among us. I have to believe I'll see them again, one day.
Shane will play a song for me, maybe he'll sing too. I'm SURE he'll find a cat or two or ten to share with me!
Laura will tell me about playing softball with Jesus, or some joke she told Him that made him throw his head back and laugh with glee.
As the old hymn goes, "Oh what a day, what a glorious day that will be!"
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